Monday, August 25, 2014

Mo-ti-va-tion- Where Can I Find Some?

Every now and then I have a day- like today- where I cannot focus, even if my life depended upon it.  I am sure you know what I mean.  Where I hit refresh 3003 times on Facebook only to see the same first entry over and over and think- c'mon people- someone has GOT to have something that is going to get me moving.  It's like a case of the Mondays- yet it can happen any day.

I have had some seriously non-productive days, sometimes those days stretch on to a week.  It is a little scary I will admit.  What if my mojo never comes back?  Well my friends- it always comes back.  You then start whipping out tasks like a boss.  Here are a few tips that usually work for me when my inbox has 1045 new messages(only 3 spams) and I am low on the flow.  These are in no particular order of effectiveness.

Make a list- not just any old to-do list..no sir, this is a tough time, you need inspiration. You need pep. You need your flow back.  The list must be of 2 things that you WILL finish before you leave the office, or get off the plane, or the sun goes down(hey- I have friends who are mommies. They get stuck too).  Things like- write a blog post(hint hint) for my friends blog or review one page of the financial report due next Friday(bet you read the whole thing once you start? Say $5? That'll pay for my coffee. Keep reading.).

Jack it up, um music that is.  Put on your pandora, your spotify- whatevs- not important the source, then dance..no really- your booty off.  Then get back to step one( I know you people read ahead, I do too).  Get the endorphins moving and grooving.  I have been known to bust a move on the streets of Philly, whatever you need to do man.

Stop trying to do the "work at hand" and do something you absolutely love to do.  Example: This weekend a friend of mine, was going to paint the insides of her closets and couldn't get started.  Now c'mon who wants to do that? Put it on your list (see above) and go shopping..so much more fun.. no really it is.  Once you are out shopping, you can use that momentum to keep going right into the closet for painting.  See "Objects in motion stay in motion" in your science book from like 3rd grade.

When all else fails- seek caffeine.  Yes, my go to is Dunkin- I think there is something in that brew besides coffee but hey it works for me.  You might be from Canada where it's Tim Hortons (or some such nonsense-- Help me Canadian friends from the north) or you may be the triple shot mocha-chocka- latte fancy pants.. it's all good.  JUST move. 

Ok, back to the refresh button on the email-- or maybe I will turn up some Morris Day and the Time- hey don't judge, I am from the 80s.  Ohh - Weee - Ohh - Wee - Ohhh!



Wednesday, August 20, 2014

"So You're Telling Me, There's a Chance" - Three Tips to Get What You Want Even When the Chance is One in a Million

One of my favorite movie lines of all time is from the Jim Carey movie, Dumb & Dumber.  After asking out a pretty lady and her saying his chances of dating her were one in a million, Jim's character's response was "So you're telling me there's a chance!".  I love this because it rings true for me. Maybe not in the dating scene anymore these days( happily married mom of three here!), but definitely in my work life.

At the office there are some co-workers who love to reference Nicole's world.  Things happen in Nicole's world that do not happen in "real life".    At first this hurt my feelings a little bit.

When planning a massive convention a few years back, I insisted that we would not pick from the predetermined hotel menu, but rather, the chef would design a menu FOR us.  Someone made an off-hand comment like, "well you know in "Nicole's world" people do that".  It wasn't until I called the chef myself and explained our budget constraints and that I knew that at other hotels this was common practice that the chef gave in and gave me what I wanted- a pizza bar.( You are welcome attendees- it was delish)

Suddenly, Nicole's world went from a derogatory place where Nicole was the crazy pants, to wow- Nicole can make things happen.  Here are a few tips to becoming the gal that makes things happen.

1.  Do not take no for an answer.  No really, don't.  Keep on asking for what you want.  The key to this is asking in different ways.

2.  Make sure you are speaking to the person with the power to change the outcome.  As women, we tend to not want to make people uncomfy, so asking for the supervisor is not a move we make early on.  Don't waste your time.  If the chef is the decision-maker that orders the food, ask to speak to him out of the box.

3.  You must believe that what you are asking can be done.  This is critical mindset guru type stuff.  YOU  must believe in your heart that what you are asking can happen.  If you do not, you will phrase your questions in a way that let's the listener know that you can be dismissed.  "Can we have pizza buffet? I know that it is not on the menu, but I know that our people love pizza and it would make us super happy." NOOOO.  Try this "At our price point, we would like to work with the chef(decision maker) to create our own menus. We will call him at his convenience to make this happen."

Super-charge your girl power and ask for what you really want.  I know you can do it- no matter what others may say.  Pretty soon, you will have your own world and believe me, it is nice to be the queen of Nicole's World!

Thursday, August 14, 2014

This Little Light of Mine...

Those who know me would tell you that I am a confident leader and always have been.  They would say, "Nicole- she knows herself and her worth and would NEVER stand for someone dropping the proverbial bushel on her light."  They would be right, TODAY.  That was not always the case.

Today, I am an award-winning marketer who has changed the face of multiple companies, bringing them back from the edge of closing to being profit turning vehicles for change.  A couple of decades ago, I was a twenty-something entering the workforce.  Not unlike the many young women I work with today, I was a little unsure of certain things, but there was one thing I was totally confident about- my ability to market an idea.  You see, I understood from a very young age how others think and what motivates them to move.  It was my gift.  You have a gift too- if you haven't figured it out yet, there are exercises you can do to get some clarity on it and sometime soon, I will write about them. Ah, but I digress.  I knew then, as I know now, I can move people to rally behind my cause.

Early on, I was working for an amazing cause and really enjoying the opportunities.  My boss came to me one day and asked me to come up with a campaign that would engage a certain audience to participate in our fundraising and public relations efforts toward a major new program.  I became obsessed as most people do wen they are uber passionate about their work.  I brainstormed, I thought constantly about my idea until I perfected it.  My boss was an amazing business woman and mentor.  She allowed me to have free reign over the project, from start to finish.  It was a mega-success.  So successful that a co-worker submitted it to a national contest and it won!  Imagine eating the best dessert and not having to count those calories- yes-  I am a total foodie!  My project WON! I still get excited when I think about it.  I was going to walk onto the stage and thank all the little people and my parents for getting to this point in my life. I had my speech written when one day my boss came into my cubicle.

She greeted me slowly and kind of stood there. What followed shocked me.  She told me she would be accepting the award on behalf of the organization, you know- as Executive Director.  After I picked my jaw up from the floor, I of course agreed, even though my inside super-rock-star was screaming-"WTF"!  After a day or so of thinking about it, I went to her office to discuss my feelings about her decision.  I tactfully told her I had written and executed the entire project and that it was important to me to receive the award myself.  I then swallowed hard and asked her what her reservation was of me at least joining her on the stage to get the award.  Her words sting me to this day.  She said, "Do you EVEN own a suit?".  BOOM.  Now, my forty-something self would be telling me do not let this bother you, but back then it struck me hard. So hard I made major changes.

Over the course of several months, I literally became my boss.  All business..All the time.  I lost myself completely.  My little light that made people want to help me and follow me and make amazing projects and create significant social change, went out.  I was all about the numbers(they are important and I still value them now, but there is such a thing as too much).  I wore the starchy suits, even when I was speaking to a group of kindergarten kids.  It took me years to realize it.  That was not me.  The real me wanted to get on the floor and sit pretzel legged and tell stories of the kids we were helping, to make those kids want to help- to ignite their glow.   

I walked across the stage at that conference and received my award with my boss.  She thanked the many who made it successful and shortly there after my boyfriend, who is now my husband, shared that something in me changed .  Then little by little others started to ask me if I was alright.  I started to realize that they were asking because I wasn't being authentically me.  The years that followed moved me through many transformations and a few new gigs that let me start putting my jeans back on and recognizing that it is cool to be who you are.  I arose a stronger leader for my experience. A leader who watches my words for I know the affect they have.  I re-lit my own spark and now my little light shines so bright- I wear my sunglasses at night(hey that is a totally different song!).